The Hamburglar learns English

• Some pretty funny shit has happened this week.  It's been a good couple days.  I hit Costco with some coworkers, and boy is that a mixed bag of feelings.  I mean, it *is* Costco... but it's just, WRONG.  It's not quite right.  There's still your red with white lettering signs hanging over the deli, you've got the middle aisles covered in clothing and books, you've got massive boxes of sixteen bottles of orange juice.  But the prices are WHACKED, the food is only marginally-recognizable, and ... yeah.  I'll probably still get a membership.
  
• One of my students cracked me up today.  A little eager kid, a little overweight maybe, and by Korean standards not North American.  We were discussing the concept of good and bad morality, about crime, mysteries, solving puzzles, etc.  The word "steal" came up, and I tend to be fairly animated when I explain things to my kids.  So I hypothesized about stealing one kid's eraser, and asked the class whether it was good or bad, "stealing is bad, teacher!" etc.  Then I pretended to steal a bunch of food from the imaginary grocery store, "stealing is bad, teacher!" etc.  Then... then I pretended to steal food from McDonalds.  Oh boy.  "TEACHER HOW??!!"  This kid screamed.  Wide-eyed and mouth open, he just had to know.  How do you knock off a burger at McD's.  "TEEEACHER HOW?!?"  I've never laughed so hard.
  
• Went exploring a certain neighbourhood yesterday.  One of my friends will be coming to Seoul shortly, and I wanted to take a peek around her area just to make sure I could help her get settled.  Coolest area, really.  Tons to do.  I hardly got to see the half of it.  And ritzy, too.  There's some money here.  It's the Rodeo Drive of Seoul, at least in the Gangnam region.
  
  
  

  

  You ever see a building you just knew you had to pee in?

• Found the Lotte building in Hanti.  This is the Tiffany's of shopping in my area.  Some really expensive stuff here.  The creepy part about this store though, is the staff.  They stand like soldiers, perfectly still except for a short bow as soon as a customer passes.  They all stand at their station, in perfect rows behind their counters, staring straight ahead.  No talking, moving, chewing, blinking.  Just, still.
  This is in complete contrast to the many small stalls littered around Seoul, where the clerks will ask you to wait a second before selling you their wares because their favourite TV show is almost over.  "Come back in ten minutes" is not uncommon.
  
• I'm going to drop a few airhorn blasts in the Lotte building sometime.  That'll be a riot.
  
• I also found the seedy underbelly of Gangam.  Redlight district, if I may.  Dozens of love motels, massage parlours with curtains,  and "barbers".  The last one makes me laugh.  Either these hairdressers have chosen a truly horrible place to open their businesses, or brothels are trying too hard to appear legit.  Either way, she butchered my hair.
  
  

  

  Hard to read, but the school's name is "Slow Reading School".
  You should probably enroll your kid somewhere else.

  

  Severance Hospital.
  I think I'd rather just walk it off.

  

  This place rules.  Logo looks like a star finally swallowed Mario instead.

  

  You don't get this stuff often at home.  This guy was three bucks.
  A slab of beef, though?  Eight dollars a pound.